Occasionally
I am asked to prepare and give a talk at my church. This is a chance to
share my thoughts and feelings about the gospel of Jesus Christ and how His
teachings influence my life. A couple weeks ago I had one of those opportunities.
Below is what I shared. I hope it is of value to someone out there reading!
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Hello
everyone.
I’m glad to
be here today sharing some thoughts with you.
As a little
background about me I could just give the basics, like that I’ve lived all
over, moving here from Alaska, and lived in New York City longer than anywhere
else since high school. Or wax eloquent about why I love Boston and am so glad
to be back for a second tour of duty. But, instead, I decided to share five
random facts as an intro to me:
- #1 I’m on track, actually ahead of
schedule, to meet my goal to read 100 books this year
- #2 For over a decade I’ve mailed out a
Christmas/Year in Review card – I’m on the fence about sending one out this
year. What would I say? Sat in my house most of the year, also rode my bike and
knit a lot?
- #3 I’m a closet musician – I LOVE music
but am afraid to sing or play in front of people. I’m working on overcoming
this fear (starting with my roommates) extra points for you if you can identify
both instruments I play.
- #4 Setting really specific goals is a
knack I have – like wanting to sell a puzzle with a photograph I took on it.
- #5 For years I’ve been standing on the
edge of this cliff of starting my own business. Really committing – jumping
into the abyss and seeing if I fly, learn to swim after getting in over my
head, or some unforeseen other twist in this path of life.
I shared #5
last on purpose. Because it is the foundation for so much of my life right now
and the inspiration for this talk.
With all the
uncertainty going on in my personal life and in the world this year, I found
myself slipping out of habits and routines. Floundering a bit with how I
should, could, and wanted to spend my time.
There are
other times I have felt this way in the past. One was during grad school the
first time I lived in Boston. During a meeting with the supervisor of a
research project I was helping with, she asked how I was doing. I was frank and
told her I was feeling a little overwhelmed. She asked me, “Have you been
reading your Book of Mormon?”
That
question humbled me and has stuck with me for over a decade. This woman
remembered something I had told her when she came upon me reading from the Book
of Mormon while waiting for a different meeting with her months prior. I told
her that reading that book brought me peace and kept me grounded.
So, when I
recognized this feeling of uncertainty and feeling untethered, I decided once
again to turn back to my scriptures.
[as a side
note, I admire people like Daryl – he shared recently that he has read his
scriptures every day since his mission. I think that is incredible. But, I find
myself much more likely to ebb and flow in my scripture reading. Both in
actually spending time with the scriptures, and with how productive and
meaningful that time is – maybe you can relate?]
I’ve found
that doing topical study has often been the most effective way for me to learn
from the scriptures and also is an effective way for me to jump back in when I
find I’ve drifted away for a time. And it helps me understand why we are
encouraged to “liken all scriptures unto us” at the beginning of the Book of
Mormon by Nephi (see 1
Nephi 19:23).
This time I
had the idea (maybe impression or nudge from God?) to see what the scriptures
could teach me about work.
I opened my
physical scriptures flipping to the index of the triple combination and pulled
up a word doc and typed in the first reference under: Work, verb. Here is what
I typed:
- 1
Nephi 16:28 – “they [the pointers of the Liahona] did work according to the
faith and diligence and heed which we did give unto them”
This verse
is referring to a time when Nephi’s family was traveling in an unknown
wilderness using a tool called the Liahona (which I like to think about as an
ancient GPS). On the surface, this has nothing to do with my current situation –
I’m not wandering through a desert, I’m sitting at my computer day after day
trying to figure out marketing and key words and SEO and how to package flowers
made from leaves so they won’t break while shipping. But as I read those words
and opened my mind to what God could teach me, here is what I typed under the
scripture reference:
- 1) In order for things to work, both our
actions AND our attitude matters. Intent AND follow through. We have to have
faith AND diligence and heed
- 2) I read a caption on a post yesterday
that talked about the need for diligence – they talked about “how many people
you don’t end up working with because you don’t follow up” (because you’re
scared of looking like a stalker).” I would never have worked for Pinecones and
Needles if I hadn’t continued to follow up and reach out. The same thing is
true of moving to Alaska and getting a job I wanted there. Both times I decided
what I wanted to do and then I doggedly pursued until it worked.
- 3) I also like this because it puts
responsibility back on me – if things are not working out, there is more I can
do to help things work out. Which doesn’t mean I’ll always get what I want, but
I believe that if what I want more is to heed God’s direction and spiritual
growth, the other things I want will shift to fit those bigger goals when
needed
With that
first step back towards the scriptures I returned more fully to seeking answers
and insight from God for my life right now.
In my quest
to become more like our Savior Jesus Christ, another thing I have always leaned
on quite heavily in my life is the wisdom of others. Talking about a problem or
idea helps me understand and work through it. So, as I continued my scripture
study on Work I shared some of the ideas and insight with my roommate Liz. She
said, “That sounds like a blog post you should write.” And with that
encouragement from her, I did.
Here is an
excerpt from that
blog post:
“Reading in 2
Nephi 5:15 it talks about how Nephi taught his people to do fine
craftsmanship. They built buildings and created art and beauty in their
community. They learned skills from someone who had already honed those skills.
For me this was a cool reminder both that there are
incredible people who I can seek knowledge and skill from AND that I have
skills and abilities that I can seek to share with others.
There is power in creating beauty, in being industrious, in
expanding and enriching our minds - because we also improve the world and
people around us in the process.”
Just as I
find greater knowledge from talking things through with others, writing does
this for me, too. I love the power of words. And I love putting them together
in a way that may help or inspire someone else.
While
listening to our leaders speak in General Conference last week, I heard some
words that related to this little project of mine.
In a talk
titled Becoming
like Him, Elder Scott D. Whiting, of the Seventy said:
“It is
important for me as I strive to become like Him [Jesus Christ] to record my
experiences and what I am learning.”
This makes
me think of what the sister missionaries in our ward have been teaching as they
help us work on personal mission plans – we have to teach and share in a way
that works for us. Writing my personal scripture study journal and writing blog
posts that I put out publicly are both ways that allow me to gain deeper
personal understanding. And also provides me with an opportunity to share what
I learn with others – to give them a gift, an opportunity to feel God’s love
and grow and expand their understanding.
Armed with
increasing understanding of the role of work, and how I could apply principles
taught in the scriptures to my personal endeavors with my business, I took
steps forward. I made plans, set goals, relaunched my Etsy shop, was brave and
told people – individually and through social media.
Then on the
way to an afternoon hike a few weeks ago my friend asked me, “Did you sell all
the things on your shop yet?”
My shoulders
visibly slumped. My brain instantaneously went through all the things I had
planned to do and did not. The nasty side of my brain said things like “See,
you can’t really do this. You are a failure – clearly if you weren’t you would
have sold all the things.” Aloud I admitted, no, I had not. And launched into a
list of the things I had meant to do – the work I should have put in – but didn’t.
He cut me
off, and his words were piercing and sustaining:
“Don’t
punish yourself. Yeah, you should try to keep up with things, but you don’t
need to beat yourself up. There are natural consequences for your actions or
lack of actions that are already punishment enough.”
What a cool
perspective. And it made me realize something else: If I don’t like the natural
consequences of my choices, I can make different choices.
Dwelling on
what I didn’t do doesn’t help me. Looking at what worked and doing more of that
is wise. Looking at what didn’t work and trying something else is helpful and
can lead to future success.
This current
project to seek answers and insight from the scriptures on work has reminded me
there is great value in looking at the scriptures through new eyes, in the
context of our current situation and experiences. And there is power in finding
a way to record and share what you learn.
Each day,
regardless of what we did or did not do the day before, we can choose to give
some of our time to God. We can choose to read His words given to use through
the scriptures. We can choose to apply those words in our lives. We can choose
to ponder and seek to understand them more deeply.
In closing
I’ll echo the testimony I put in my
blog post:
I’m grateful for the scriptures, and for a Heavenly Father
who loves me enough to provide personal direction as I read from His words
written and preserved by those who came before me. I’m grateful for continuing
personal revelation and the chance to see God’s hand in my life and feel His
love as I intentionally turn to Him.
I know God
loves us. I know He wants us to succeed and to become like Him. I know He will
speak to you, personally and directly in a way you will recognize and
understand. As Marcie taught us so powerfully a few weeks ago – He will meet
you where you are, whenever you are ready and willing.
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