Focus on the big picture or details?

I was invited to participate in a fundraising breakfast for an organization that seeks to reform the prison system in America with a particular focus on helping the families affected by a family member being incarcerated. Throughout my higher education experience I have often thought of this part of our society and it breaks my heart. When I was transitioning between jobs last time I even put effort into finding something related to the prison/ juvenile justice system and was (and still kind of am) considering finding a career along those lines.

Throughout the morning there were several speakers – including a mother who has been incarcerated for money laundering and her son who was about to graduate from high school. The various speakers said several things that have really stuck with me and really impacted me when I heard them.

In the beginning there was an invocation offered by a local rabbi. He had many wonderful and wise things to say, but the one that has stayed with me was his closing request that we “live in righteousness and faith.”

Then the organization was introduced. It was praised for its holistic vision, touted as an organization that “speaks truth to power” and praised for being “champions of freedom” – sounds pretty cool to me. Then the phrase that really got me – “We don’t just advocate for families, we advocate for policies that support families.” In my academic pursuits and now in my career pursuits I’m always struggling with that balance – being able to make a difference right now in the lives of children and families and working to make the structure we work in a better one to set more people up for long term success. Where and how are my specific talents and energies going to be best utilized? Where can I have the biggest, longest lasting impact? Questions that can start making me crazy…

After we ate, the mother mentioned above talked about what her life was like – how it appeared perfect from the outside, but really her marriage was falling apart and her husband was having her participate in illegal activities to maintain his habits. As she put it “appearances can hide a lot.” It is so tempting to think we know what others are going through or to think that lives are perfect because of what we can see. However, I have learned over and over again that usually people have pain, sadness, loneliness, fear, regret or other things hidden behind their brave smiles and seemingly calm and put together exteriors.  I think we could avoid a lot of negative situations if we were more aware of those around us and willing to provide kindness and acceptance and support for those we come in contact with.

It seems to me that no matter what I do for a living, it is important to create opportunities to make a difference right now in the lives of those around me. And maintaining my faith and hope in each individual and their ability to become better small steps at a time and expressing love to each person I interact with are powerful ways to support them. 

As someone I overheard on the phone at a park said, just do something, anything and then learn as you go. Great advice :)

When I grow up I want to be . . .

A friend of mine invited me to come to a music symposium about “choosing the life of a musician” and I was intrigued. I didn’t really know what to expect, but I like music, and I like new experiences, so I went.

The idea was that these musicians would preform songs and before and after (and sometimes in the middle) of their pieces they would talk about how they got where they are and why they chose to be a musician.

It was really cool.

One of the ideas that one of the musicians shared that really struck me was that as you know someone better, you relate more to what they play, and how they play, and then the music means more to you.

I thought back to some of the experiences I have had sitting in my living rooms in various apartments listening to someone I know play the guitar. Or growing up and listening to my brothers play the piano. Those were very different experiences than listening to the radio, or even being at a concert in a large hall. As I have thought more about it, I think it has a lot to do with my knowing the people who were playing.

At this specific living room performance, I was really moved by some of the ideas shared. One pianist spoke about his initial desire to learn to play the piano – to show medical schools that he had manual dexterity. He was a double chemistry and piano major. At one point he realized that if he kept doing both he would not be able to do either well.

Another performer who had more years of experiences than most of the other musicians talked about how she decided to pursue her career in music later in life – a decision she made when she was about the age of the rest of the performers. She said she made her decision knowing that she would never have the advantages and probably never reach the same heights as those who started younger. But she also knew that anything she kept doing she would eventually be good at. Maybe not amazing, but good (a distinction I LOVE - and has gotten me thinking that not everything has to be amazing or the best ever to be worth it and incredible moving or helpful to others). She has kept pushing and practicing and I personally think she has incredible skill.

Those two thoughts are interesting juxtapositions to me. On one hand, we can only do so much, and the more we try to do the less time we can give to any one task. This forces us to make choices about how to spend our time. On the other hand, we have the choice to pursue so many things – any number of which we can become very proficient at.

I walk away from this knowing that I must make some decisions. And realizing that the reality is I can make almost any choice I want to and, as long as I passionately pursue it, I'll likely find fulfillment and find opportunities to share what I love with others.

Leaving Lighter

Yesterday was my first day back working my shift at the Temple after my vacation. The Temple is a beautiful place, and I had missed the peace I feel there and the opportunity to work and serve with wonderful, dedicated individuals.

Since I had been gone for several weeks, I had brought my clothing home to clean and not take up space in the locker room. Naturally, I had to bring them back to use them again. So, I went into the temple with a small purse and a larger bag with my clothing.

Being back was like coming home in all the best ways possible. Seeing familiar faces and knowing that I was needed and appreciated was rewarding. Assisting those who came to the Temple to worship and serve reminded me of the purpose behind giving up so much of my time on Saturday's. I couldn't stop smiling and I often reflected on how grateful I am to have this assignment at this time.

Then it was time to leave for the evening. As I got on the elevator I realized I was traveling much lighter. I only had my small purse since my bag with my clothing was in the locker room waiting for next week. I thought about how grateful I was to be traveling lighter,  and how nice it was to leave that baggage behind.

It struck me that that is one of the purposes of coming to the Temple - to leave our worries and cares behind, to become lighter. We enter the doors full of concerns or fears or disappointments or heartaches or questions. We then worship God and are reminded of the purpose of this life. We have time to be taught and time to reflect. We end our time in the Temple in silent prayer, pondering and reflection. Then we can leave emotionally lighter. What a beautiful thing!

I am reminded of a passage of scripture in the New Testament:

28 ¶Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:28-30