A New Perspective on an Old Thought

A couple weeks ago at church one of the speakers talked about how we can get stuck thinking the same thoughts and getting the same insight when we read the same passages of scriptures. He suggested this is particularly true if we read the same copy and we have written notes or highlighted verses. I had an experience that made me think there may be some truth to that.

Towards the end of July I participated in a Youth Conference as a leader. One of the speakers challenged the youth to read The Book of Mormon from cover to cover in the month of July. I thought to myself, "that's a great goal for them" and then started to realize that it would be a good goal for me too. This was a daunting task - 531 pages in about 27 days (I started late...) and I knew I would have to read on the train rides to and from work to make this happen. So, I read from a pocket sized edition that I haven't read before and marked up.

All that is a long introduction to one of the insights I had during that intense and rewarding experience in July.

I was reading in 3 Nephi 13 where the Savior is teaching the people on the American continent after his Crucifixion and Resurrection. In verse 24 he says:

"No man can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will hold to the one and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and Mammon."

In the past, I have always felt disheartened by this verse of scripture. I know that I am far from perfect and am acutely aware of my own short comings and all the mistakes I make. I have often wondered if I am a bad person pretending to be good. I have often felt that if I were clinging to God I would not do many of the things that I do, and thus, by deduction, I must cling to/ serve Mammon.

However, as I read this verse this time I realized that I could just as easily be holding to God and despising the times that I fall short and choose to do something that serves Mammon instead of God.

It also caused me to take a step back. I feel that I am very willing to give people the benefit of the doubt and that I want to assume that people are doing the best they can and that they don't mean any harm. I want others to feel loved, and I truly believe that everyone can change and that we all deserve second chances. And I realized that this must be true for me as well. I have to give myself a second (or tenth, or 100th) chance and I have to keep striving to continually serve God and turn back to God every time I find myself moving away.